No, not a reference to my female cycle as I’m sure the rumormongers had hoped! I’m 3.5 months late on figuring out my new year’s resolution.

In my previous personal post, I stated that I wasn’t sure what 2009 was going to be for me yet. I think it has taken a few months to crystalize around the concept of vulnerability.

It started with the realization that I am a lot less shy than I used to be just a couple of years ago, and how silly I was for being shy over small stuff. I began to embrace being vulnerable within my dating life, from telling someone I used to have a crush on them to Twittering about someone I met that I thought was cute to asking a guy why he went on a date with someone else and not me. All things I used to be absolutely terrified of doing. While I anticipated feeling incredibly embarassed, the process of pushing past my threshold became surprisingly addictive and gave me a huge wave of relief. I suppose it goes in step with all the rainbows and unicorns that are supposed to appear when consultants tell brands about the benefits of being “open”.

In the exploration of vulnerability, however, I’ve discovered that it’s much more difficult to be vulnerable when it comes to work – this is an observation in other people as much as it is myself. As said at SXSW by Ben Brown, the difference between self-employed and unemployed is in your head – but that doesn’t make it any less difficult to announce to people your paycheck status when you’re trying to say, “no, really, I need more things on my plate”. And with me, I know I have trolls and stalkers who are just licking their fangs at the delight of this vulnerability (but of course, they’re also the ones who are the first to attack me every time I experience any recognition/success).

And while a low-to-no paycheck status might be great for creativity, “unemployment” can be like being sick: you have all the time in the world to do whatever you want to do, but like being sick, it’s difficult to focus past the cloud of needing to take care of yourself. This isn’t really a complaint, so much as my personal description of what it’s been like to be on the low-to-no status for a few months. I suppose this makes my other resolution to be to keep producing lots of stuff and putting it out there in the face of this financial “fog”. Good thing I have a shit ton of awesome ideas and people around me

(photo of Natalie Villalobos and I at SXSW 2008 via Tantek)

With many creator-types unemployed or between clients, trendhunters expect a new sprouting of startups, echoing the creation of web 2.0 companies from the post-dot-com unemployed. I don’t believe that will happen in the same way. Peoples’ piggy banks are squealing and while web 2.0 companies got started with minimal money, most individuals now don’t even have enough to take the startup step forward.

Rather, I am witnessing a high tide of what I’m dubbing “pico projects” (terminology partially influenced by the recent launch of Picocool). Small projects developed by an individual with input from nearby friends as a makeshift advisory council, with little to no concern for monetization (at least at launch), just the desire to see an idea through to fruition.

Within my immediate circle, the launches of pico projects such as Huffduffer, Baconfile, Picocool and (my own) Spacehack are examples of this new wave. Projects that are more than single-serving sites, but less than a pitched business plan or even what Jason Calacanis has dubbed the $5-10k “microstartup“.

My friend and sometimes advisor to Spacehack, Ben Ward, points out that the shift from startup to pico project is not only due to a downturn (as some of these pico projects are more mini moonlighting outside of day jobs), but to the pervasiveness of tools readily available today as compared to just a few years ago. As a non-developer, this rings clear – my project in its current state uses about the limits of what I can “hack” together on my own without dependency on a developer. But this is also true for developers, as frameworks like Django have more easily allowed for the development of endeavors like Baconfile.

In mentioning this slight shift, Jeremy Keith pointed me to £5 App, a meetup for individual or two creators to showcase simple software that they decided to just go ahead and execute. I particularly enjoy this line from the meetup description:

“The discussion will range from technical (what tools/languages were used during development) to business (building communities, spreading the word, costs and rewards).”

…calling attention to the fact that these projects care more about building communities than how to talk to angel investors.

What are some pico projects you’ve come across or built in the last few months? I’ll link any I find to be interesting from the comments at the bottom of this post.

Other interesting pico projects:
• Not in the comments, but Jeremy Keith pointed me to Readernaut
• Josh McKenty, a colleague from NASA, reminded me of the TinyApps project
• Emily Chang introduced me to 4am Project
• Blaine Cook recently created TinyArchive

(the title, a reference to XFN. the picture, a reference from 2007 to my excitement to move to San Francisco.)

I’ve been debating for a while writing a post that is more personal. I don’t typically like blogging about myself, as evidence through my writing at Shake Well Before Use, and most of my personal life can be obtained through Twitter already. I always think “no one cares” to read about me – there’s so much far more exciting stuff out there to be consuming! However, I love reading my friends’ blogs and the idea that they have someone that enjoys reading their more introspective moments in hopes of gleaning some insight.

2008 was an interesting year. Interesting sounds so terribly boring. By “interesting”, there were ups and downs, some of which were captured on this site.  In work, there were a lot of great, new, rewarding experiences that I truly cherished and hope to continue. I’ve now worked in multiple industries: advertising, technology, science, government, and I could be an arse and stretch it to culinary with CupcakeCamp . But, by the end of the year, I felt like I was having empty nest syndrome – NASA CoLab went into hibernation from being a program, Pownce shut down and Yahoo! Brickhouse, where I often coworked, was figuratively demolished.

In dating, it was a year of biting the bullet and putting myself out there – both ways. I walked out of one situation, realizing I valued my independence and all the things I wanted to accomplish more than anything. I walked in to another situation, and for once lifted both of my feet off the ground.

Outside of income-related activities, there has always been my personal work. In years past, blogging took up most of my time (at my peak, I was posting 6 times a day). In 2008, I unintentionally transitioned from blogging to creating projects like Spacehack and CupcakeCamp. I can’t explain the amount of positive energy that is generated by being part of something that generates so many passionate people. Dare I say that it is no longer about the content or the context – it is about the community.

While I miss blogging as often (and I’m seriously considering starting a community management column), I realize that this is in step with why I moved to San Francisco in the first place. I wanted to be around people who actually created things rather than just talked about what everyone else was creating. I also realized that my move to SF was very much following in my mother’s footsteps. After watching Milk (a very emotional movie to watch after Prop 8 passing) and conversing with my mother about what it was like to live through that time in San Francisco, she told me that the first time she walked down Telegraph Avenue, she felt she had finally found home.

I don’t know what 2009 will be for me just yet. I’m filled with so much energy to release right now, so that’s exciting at the very least. December was a personally painful month that I’ve now let pass through me (like a storm, as one of my dear friends put it). All I can (and care to) concentrate on now is what I’m here to do and the people who need to hear what I have to say.